How to Get Him to Commit

One of my friend’s always seems to find herself in an unspoken relationship. You know, the kind where the two of you talk all the time, see each other on a regular basis and may even sleep together. And for a while, this is great. But after a few months or so, she always finds herself wanting to know what their future is. Then she comes to the same conclusion each time: she’s more in association with someone than an actual relationship. And I know she’s not the only woman who has been in this predicament.

When it comes to love, how do you make it official? It’s not as if we’re in middle school where it was as simple as passing a  note with “Will you go with me?” scribbled in red pen with  “Yes,” “No,” and “Maybe” boxes. No, we’ve hit the age of the gray area we know as the “talking phase,” that can last for months with no promise of a relationship. Truth is, there are no secrets or tricks that will get your would-be boo to commit to you. If he wants you to himself, he’ll make that move on his own. But there are three things you can do to let him know that he should make you his.

Be Worth Committing To. No one wants to tie themselves down to someone who is useless. If you want your man to be with you, make yourself worth the commitment. Show him your interests and how they align with his. Let him see your sweet side. Blow his mind! There’s no room to be at nothing but your best. He should be able to see through your actions that you are someone he should want to himself. If you’re like every other woman who he encounters, then he won’t see a need to want you exclusively.

Make Him Wait. You’ve heard the saying, “Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?” Well, why should your man make you his girlfriend if he gets all he wants from you without any commitment? If you want him to commit to you and only you, he has to have some sort of motivation to do so. Keep him interested by withholding certain privileges for after you becoming his girlfriend, namely sex. Because if he sees no added benefits to you being his woman, then he won’t make that move towards a real relationship.

Tell Him What You Want. You can’t expect the man to know what you’re thinking. Do you want to find love, marriage and a happily ever after? Do you feel that the two of you have gotten to a point where you should be transitioning into a commitment? Let him know. Don’t be overbearing or pushy about the situation. But if a relationship is something that you want from him, then the best way for him to know that is to just tell him.

Don’t be fooled, this isn’t a foolproof plan to get your man to commit a lifetime to you in 90 days or less. Love never works like that. He could see all the signs that you are someone he should want to be with and still not want a relationship. Or he may not need you to deliberately show him any of this for him to decide he wants you exclusively. That’s the beauty of dating and love.


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(via Elite DC Mag)


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